12,775 Day Rewind

Another year gone.  Another New Year's Party.  Later on....

But what's more important to me today is reflection.  And to sit still and think about the hits and misses of past 365 days.  So as I began to do my annual ritual, strangely my mind went further back.  Waaaayyyy back.  Like 12,775 days back.

I remembered jumping Double Dutch in the streets and stopping mid jump to let the cars pass...at the last minute of course.

I also remembered jumping in unison with as many as could fit inside the clothes line bought at the corner store.  As we sang as loud as we could!

"All in together, any kind of weather, I see the teacher, lookin' out the window, ding dong, the fire bell!!!"

I remembered Playing softball, touch football, and hide and go seek...at night! (Which was a really big deal.)

Playing jacks on the porch,
Drawing Hopscotch boxes on the sidewalk, and playing dodgeball.

Swinging on swings.  

Ponytails blowing in the wind as I rode my purple bike down asphalt hills.   Breeze whipping across my face.

Patty cakes and roller skates, slip n slide, and skate boards.  Plastic water guns that held about 1/2 cup of water....if that.  But no one seemed to mind because it was enough to hit your target.

"Mother May I", "Simon Says", and break dancing!

And a game simply called "IT".  And whatever "IT" was you ran like a fool trying to get as far away as you could.

It really was a wonderful life in those days.

And even though I am taking another step away from "those days" tonight, this morning I just felt like taking a few steps backward.  Because going backward is not always a bad thing.

December 31, 2014

Drum Roll Puhleeze

Woman enters the library and as she passes the security guard he says, "Nice toes!"

The woman looks down at her daintily painted yellow toes and smiles and replies "Thank you.".  

She walks up the escalator and scouts for a seat.  The library is full even on a warm summer night.  She plops down at a table of four and seats herself next to a young African-American brother with a hoodie and his PC.   She thinks to herself, "Why does he have a hoodie on in the library in the summer?"  but she dismisses the thought.  As long as he doesn't look crazy she figures that she will be fine.

She pulls out her new purple Mac out of her bag and begins to gather her thoughts,  As she starts to type, all of a sudden she smells something....

Sniff.  Sniff.

I won’t even begin this post with excuses as to why I haven’t been on here because honestly does anyone really give a fluck?  LOL.  I just need to fix the damn problem with my lack of appearances in cyberspace and get things done.  I feel myself getting rusty so I need to write to keep my skills sharp.

This time instead of writing about what I have not done on the blog, the only thing that I will say is that I have put writing on my weekly schedule so I can AT LEAST put my eyeball on blogger.com.  So here I am on a nice summer night in the library pecking away at my computer.  I feel a bit proud of myself!   I've only been here about 15 minutes but there is a musty muthafucca sitting next to me wrecking my damn flow.  This is the only free table with computer outlets so I’ll just try to make it work and cover my nose when he shifts in his seat.  I just need to bang this post out.  

(holds breath)

Ok here we go.

First I will at least quickly recap the last few months to try to bring things up to date.

NEWSFLASH!!!!  Believe it or not I actually have ONE man now.  Not even a backup dude to dabble in now and then.  The way I had operated for years was to always have at least two dudes on the roster, but as time has passed I have slowed down with that A LOT.  For one it’s too hard to manage, and number two these guys got too much shit going on with them for me to be dealing with a double dose of drama.  The older they get the more rock headed they get and it is just too much!  Men get to be soooooo much work after a while.  
And what gets me is that men have the damn nerve to be talking about women of a certain age got baggage when they are honestly some big fluckin babies themselves   They are just as sensitive as women and  throw fits and tantrums like toddlers.   All THEE time.  Word.

So let's introduce my dude as Trinidad.  He is pretty alright.  He acts and does a lot of the things I like and he is tolerable….not perfect…but tolerable.  He can be a lot of work and sensitive too…he ain’t no different than what I said earlier.  I just realize that’s how men eventually turn out to be so now I just try to work with it and see where it goes.  We have been dating for about 2.5 years and for me that’s some amazing shit!  So let’s see how long I can keep this up.  I’ll have to elaborate on dude another time because something between us is brewing.  Like I said before — he ain’t perfect, and neither am I.  

Anyway....financially things are better too.  Last September I blogged that I quit a job and took a consultant temp role that was a $25k per year pay cut.  It was a dice roll and some may have called me stupid, but that dice roll eventually paid off because taking that step backwards opened doors for me in a major way.  I kept interviewing for something better and was getting turned down left and right, but within three months I got a new job making over six figures.  So in the long run the risk paid off big time and has helped me to put almost $66,000 dollars in my savings account.  Who woulda thought that I could make that happen?!!!  That $66K may not be a huge amount, but seeing that in the past I barely had $200 saved this is a major achievement.  Since my bankruptcy in 2010 things have gotten way better and I swear doing that was the best (and toughest) decision that I ever made.  Yeah I have the ding on my credit report for a few more years but my worries about paying my bills are gone.  I can save money now and my credit score has improved over 100 points since the bankruptcy.  I have paid off my car a year and a half early too.  Things are certainly way better now from when I first started writing DIARY OF A BROKE ASS WOMAN!  For realz.  And although I’ll confess that I still have my moments with spending on clothes and what not, I usually just pay the charges with a credit card and pay the balance off in the next month to keep things under control.  I have my regular job and my consulting work to bring in money to help when I fall off the shopping wagon.  Plus my credit limit is like $750 so I ain’t going too crazy with that anyway, and I put in my budget what I can spend on shopping each month.  The $750 limit ain’t nothing special but it will do me just fine because the point of using the card is to build my credit score anyway.  The website mint.com tracks my spending and puts everything into categories which helps me see how my money flows.

Um, what else has been happening???  Oh yes!  I had my “ cuteness surgery”  late last year.  Yep I did it!  The first couple days after were awful but I’m happy with the results for the most part!  There are things that I still have to do like stay fit and eat right but I’m looking way better than I did before (not that I was that bad in the first place).  I have to get into the details later but since the surgery things have ‘shifted’ to other areas and I didn’t expect that at all!  Like today when I was leaving work, somebody called me Stella.  Not sure if I liked that too much just because I hate facing the reality that I am getting older, but since Angela Bassett was looking good in that movie I guess I’ll go ahead and take it as a compliment????   And even though Trinidad was against me doing the surgery, I think NOW he is happy with the end result.  And how do I know this?  Because I can see it in his hungry eyes. 

Damn It’s good to be back writing!  I see that I have about the same number of followers so I guess that’s good!?  LOL…no it ain’t.  The blog is stagnant.  I know people were reading when I used to write about Shallow Hal and my escapades with him but since I killed them off I think folks left me.  It’s not a lot left to say on that but that was like 3-4 years ago anyway and since then Shallow Hal has just worsened with age.  We used to be cool but I have decided that I can’t be socializing with that donkey no mo’.  For the longest time I had been smelling the disrespect coming from him, and I had to remind him way too often that I was not one of his birds.  Shallow Hal is a bully and eventually made our situation rocky as hell.   We had some moments where we would actually be cool, but just as he always does, he fks up stuff to a point where I finally had to block him a couple months ago.  The downfall began when something that started out being joke on his asshole friend turned into a betrayal.  Shallow Hal proved that he wasn’t on my team and once I saw that, it was the beginning of the end of our “friendship.”  I had no loyalty to him and all we would do is argue.

Shallow Hal:  “You just wanna see me hurt for something.”

Me:  LOL.  “You just wanna see me hurt for something.”  You so damn stupid.  You deserve to "hurt for something" for all that you have done to people.  Punk ass.

And that's from one of the light conversations.  And where did all of this come from?  I’ll get into my post called THE JOKE next time but for now I will say this....it was a joke that both of us tried to set up.  After the smoke cleared it ended up with Shallow Hal showing his ass and by that point I was DONE.  He pushed me too far and THE JOKE became a mess.  

But you know what?  After everything that I have heard, Shallow Hal is probably right.  I kinda do wanna see him get knocked down off his throne.  And I've been thinking on what I can come up with to make that happen.

"Off with his head!"

More later.  I can't sit by this musty muthafucca no more!

Sad State of Bloggism

What a damn shame.

I think about blogging all the time but I can't seem to put the pen to the paper these past months!
Yeah I'm raggedy as hell.  So finally I said today lemme just try to do this from my phone to at least shake the dust off my shyt.

You know working, having a man, having business, and alla that has made me just feel so overwhelmed.  Like I used to take this blog so seriously but half the time I was writing when I was at work.  Now companies block the site and by the time I get home I'm done.  But I have to change that.  When I blogged it felt good and maybe that's what I need so I don't feel overwhelmed as much?

So many things have happened since that
posting last October.  I have done some dirty shyt, stupid shyt, smart shyt, as well as good money type of shyt.  In addition I have been the target of unwanted shyt that I needs to get on here and talk about too.  Word!
There is a lot to say because It appears that I have become an exceptional liar and a somewhat vengeful individual.  More later on that.   People might think I'm wrong for what I did, but I just had to get him!  I just had to cuz you don't talk to me like I'm one of your damn birds!  Nah bruh.

More later.  More later.
(Grrrr)

In any case I'm here.  Let's get it cracking and back to the business of blogging.

Hello World!