Thursday, December 15, 2011

Rewind: Standoff in the Subway

6:21pm.  Rush hour.

People are going every which way hustling to this train, and that bus, or whatever.  I get a glance of some subway performers flipping in the air and break dancing to loud music.  One of them stops to pass around a hat that onlookers throw money into. 

Everyone is moving fast.  Everyone seems wild eyed and full of energy.

Except this one lady.

It's 6:23pm and my train is at 6:32pm.  I have at least a five or six minute walk to get there, so yeah, I am running late...AS USUAL.

So I'm walking up the ramp and like I said this one lady stands out.  She looked like she just got off work and was tired.  White woman.  Late 40s/early 50s.  Plump.  She was carrying two bags and was kinda just slowly waddling down the walk ramp.  She stood out because she was the ONLY FOOL walking on the wrong side of the ramp.  Just like when you are always stay to the right in the subway.   Foot traffic moves a certain way just like regular traffic does.  There are rules in the subway yanno...unspoken laws that you must learn and abide by as a New Yorker.  But she clearly did not give a f*ck, and she was walking to the left going into the subway.  THE WRONG SIDE.  I was walking out of the subway and was staying to my right - like I was supposed to.  I saw her coming down like that, but I saw enough space between her and the railing that I could still get by her.  But as I get ready to pass her, she closes that space and walks right into me.   Then she presses her body against mine....


It's 6:25pm.

Me:  "Are you serious?"
Lady:  "I was here first."
Me:  "You're walking on the wrong side.  Everybody that's going into the subway is over there."
Lady:  (looking straight ahead and looking even more determined) "I was walking here first!"
So here we are, two grown azz women, bodies pressed against each other, stopped in the subway.  People are looking.  Although this woman looks pretty normal she obviously is crazy.  I'm bigger and taller than her and she don't even seem to care.  I know if I push her it's gonna be some shyt.  And I'm gonna miss my train too.

I look down at her and think to myself for a few seconds.  "Is she worth it?" 

The situation had a Civil Rights Movement kind of feel to it.  For real.  White vs. Black.  She had this air and attitude of entitlement about her.  I mean she might as well had said, "Get out of my way you n*gga."  It felt odd.  So I had to decide fast.  Was I gonna get Rosa Parks on her azz and stand my ground, or was I gonna be Martin Luther King and let her go?

It is now 6:26pm.  Six minutes left.
Me: (shaking head and laughing) "You know what, I have a train to catch.  I have no time for this.  Have a good day."  And I walk around her.

Lady:  "You have a good day too."  She was just as pleasant as pie.

"Stupid bitch", I spat.

I catch the train (barely), but I am sitting there steaming mad.  Not at her though.  At myself!

I was mad because I let her have her way.  Why did she feel that she could approach me in a threatening way like that?  Do I have the word "punk" etched on my damn forehead or something?  I was mad at myself because I should have stood my ground and pushed her azz out of the way.  I could have gotten on another train and it was not a big deal, and I used the reason for catching the train as an excuse to let this heifer slide.  I should not have let her get off that easy.  I felt like I had been punked and I didn't like the feeling.

Then I remembered how I read a few days before about a guy being convicted for killing a man in the subway who wouldn't move his bag off the seat so he could sit down.  I mean, you never know what people might do.  But still, I was mad.

So I call Chipotle.  He tells me I did the right thing by walking away but I still wasn't convinced.

Then I called Kim.  She asked me, "So would it have been better for y'all to be standing there like two fools refusing to move for each other?  The woman was clearly crazy and sometimes you just have to let those people go on."

The therapist agreed too.  She said I did the right thing.

But when I told the Tin Man, he said I should have pushed her.  In fact, when I told that story to any native New Yorker male they said I should have pushed her.  Interesting.

I dunno.  Maybe she was prejudiced.  Maybe she was crazy.  Maybe she had a bad day.  I feel I should have given her a harder time than I did.  She was clearly in the wrong and I should not have let that go like that.

I'll probably go the grave thinking I should have just knocked her on her azz and ran like I stole something.

Oh was just another day in New York City I guess.  People are just short-tempered.  The other day I saw a man threatening to punch out a sista ringing the bell for the Salvation Army collection box.   I mean really, who picks a fight with a Salvation Army person?  Damn homie, dontcha know it's Christmas! 

I had a chance to redeem myself though because something happened the next week and I didn't back off...Cuz there was no way that I was having that shyt happen to me a second time.  NOPE. 

This time it was a man who thought he was gonna f*ck with me because I was by myself at the movies.  I have no regrets on how I handled that situation though.  NOT AT ALL.

I get tired of people trying to push me around.

I'll save that story for next time.  Going to the therapist at lunch.  I think I'm gonna talk about Tin Man and what happened with that.  Hope it's a good session.

Friday, December 9, 2011

Day #801: I am trifling

I guess it would seem like I had a helluva bday back on November 11 because I haven't been on here typing.  The real deal is that I would write when I was at work, but now...I have to ACTUALLY work.  So I can't get in my writing unless I do it at home.  And when I get home, I lay on that couch and start reaching for the toy and then I'm just done.  Ain't no kind of writing gonna be going on after that okay?  I curl up and start watching Judge Judy and then fall asleep.  :)

So bottom line, I gotta write at home.  These people at work actually make me work now.  It was cool to blog and read blogs and then get paid twice a month.  But those days are gone it seems. 


I'm sneaking this little quick thing in now at work just to get something posted, because it was getting ridiculous not keeping this up to date.  I can't stand myself, and I got three messages in the past week asking where I was.  That made me smile.  So I felt compelled to at least write SOMETHING today.

But it's not like I haven't had any stories to tell cuz man I do!  I'm gonna jot down a few things while they are in my mind so I don't forget.  So here are the highlights of the latest stories>
  • Rihanna was cock blocking again with Shallow Hal at another meetup.   She is such an attention whore.  This time she was telling me how some dude called the cops on her and she got kicked outta his house.  I guess she was telling me the story so that I could be like, "Yeah girl, he's an asshole" and alla that.  And I did.  Until she started talking more, and then....
  • I have been getting all of this info for "The Interview with a Cock Sucker" series and it is just TOO, TOO JUICY!!  And not all in good way.  That cock sucker part is not sitting with me too well though, so I'm still scratching my head on a title.  But still, that is no excuse not to blog.
  • Uh...and Tin Man.  Um..well.  More later.
  • Oh and lemme not forget about this lady who comes up to me in the subway and was ready to throw down!  Just outta nowhere.  And I was mad at myself on how I handled it.
  • Oh and then get this!  I go outta town on my birthday and check a flick by myself while Shallow Hal is playing in his tournament right?  Then this dude and his son decide they wanna bully and f*ck with me in the theater!  Man, I was so damn hot!  I mean HOTTER THAN HOT!   I must share how that shyt went down cuz I was ready to go to jail that damn night.  For real.
  • What else ---um online dating.  I met like four dudes or so.  Not many.  But of course I have scorecards to share.  I always have a nice time on the dates, but when I'm through I call Kim and we giggle over whatever it is that I say about them.  I hooked up with one back in the summer...but he was just all over the place (wow I forgot about him).  I even got a story to share about a dude I never met and how he told me he can't get a date.  I think I gave him some honest advice.  I think I am gonna copy and paste the message here on the blog.  Yeah, I'm nuts.  Oh and I can't forget the dude from Cali who texted me telling me how big his feet and hands were!  Only this type of shyt happens to me.  LOL.
  • CONFESSION:  I'm addicted to this shopping website.  Seriously.  It's bad.  But I look fly though...if that counts for anything????

  • And I have been coaching my cousin who probably has so much dust on her coochie she would start a windstorm if a dude blew on it.  Trees gonna be falling over and garbage cans will be rolling in the streets when that shyt finally happens - I mean it's that dusty.  Word up.  I think she been on lock for like three years now?  God bless her!  But it's going down this weekend!  She finally gonna get her some from this dude that she met online.  The horniness was too much and think she finally hit her limit, so she gonna go 'head and get some tomorrow night.  I can hear the ANTICIPATION in her voice when she talks about the date.  So if y'all feel the ground shaking in the wee hours of Sunday morning it's probably my cousin having an orgasm out in Wisconsin.  And of course I'm gonna call her the next damn day and hear every word!  I bet she gonna be breathing all hard and acting ridiculous during it.  I can't wait to hear....and blog about it of course.  I hope dude brings his A game cuz lawd knows he got a big job in front of him.  To be silly I told her to take a picture of his d*ck and send it to me when he is sleeping.  Miss Goody Two Shoes ain't gonna do it though with her prissy azz.  It'll probably be soft when she got around to taking the picture and I don't wanna see that anyway.  I'm thinking I'm still gonna dare her to do it though...just for the hell of it. 

  • I won $2000!  A little writing thing.  Yay me.  But I'm gonna save it...for real. lemme get back to work.  I gotta hit this shopping event at 5:30pm (bad, bad girl), then I gotta run home and put my sexy pants on to bartend tonight. 

Hmmm....I hope these muthafuccas tipping tonight.  But I already know how it is so I ain't gonna gas myself up.  I stopped doing that actually.  I just need to keep my eyes on the prize and earn what I spent this week.  I spent like $300 since yesterday shopping (some were for Xmas gifts though) so I gotta make it back tonight and tomorrow.

So I'll keep my fingers crossed.  More later.

Sorry for not keeping this up to date.  LakiSwirl is one of my heroes cuz she keeps her stuff fresh!  I need to try to do the same.