Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Countdown to the BIG 40

Ok I have 18 minutes left as a 30 something woman.  I'm feeling rushed right now to do something meaningful before I am crowned as an official 40 year old.

What should I do?  What should I do?

16 minutes left.  Sanford and Son on the TV in background.  Gotta turn it off to concentrate.

11 minutes left.  Ok I went thru each year of my 30s in my mind really quick.  Damn what a decade it has been.  For real.  I'll put that detail on another post because there's no time to get into that right now.

Nine minutes left.  My manager gave me a $100 Visa card for my birthday today!!!  That was nice to get that money in the last few hours of being in my 30s.

8 minutes left.  About to take a sip of some mango flavored vodka.  WTF happened with bartending anyways....

7 minutes...I toasted to my 30s which will soon be only seen in the rear view mirror of my mind.  Did I become more of a beoch this past decade?  It seems that I am always at odds with someone.   I gotta check into that.

The vodka kinda burned my throat a little.  I'm such a wuss sometimes.  LOL.

Five minutes... Petted my cat's head and he put his paw lovingly on my arm.  My suga bear.  I'm telling you this cat has been my ride or die homie for all of this time.  Animals give unconditional love. 

One minute...hell I just thought...I did a lot in my 30s.  A helluva lot.  I took my lumps and hopefully became a better woman because of it.  Including going bankrupt.'s here.

OMG. OMG. OMG. OMG. OMG. Shaking my head. 

40 years old.  I didn't want a regular life, but it looks like that's what I have.  I was supposed to be in a better place at this age, but it seems as if I will be starting over instead.  Maybe that is something to look forward to?  Starting over?  I was supposed to be a lot farther ahead in the life game right now. 

I just looked at my face, skin, arm, gut, butt.  Hints of smile lines, and there goes that gray hair in my eyebrow again.  My booty is kinda flat too.  So is this how 40 is supposed to look?  I mean how is it supposed to feel?  Has the time passed where I can make long term goals now?  Will I ever have a child?  Will I ever get my business open again?  Will I ever find out who robbed me?  Will I ever get to punch Peanut Polly in her f'n face for putting those peanuts in my gas tank?  Will I win my court case against the people who helped contribute to the closure of my business?

Sounds like my 40s will be pretty much about cleaning up the mess made during my 30s.  Not something to look forward to but then may not be so bad.  Hell it could be worse.

1 comment:

  1. I enjoyed this post. I appreciate the realness & Fuck Peanut Polly for putting those damned peanuts in your gas tank! lol. Nobody ever said that life would be easy. I urge you to just pick up the pieces and keep it moving because if you stand still too long trying to evaluate your position in life, you'll just get run over by it. Happy belated 40th & I wish you many more. Cheers!!