Saturday, November 5, 2011


I get kinda sad.

I get sad because I feel that I shouldn't be settling for people like Shallow Hal and Tin Man, but I guess deep down I must's better than nothing?

Yeah right.

I mean...

If I could just take The Artist Formerly Known as Cornrows' niceness, loyalty and openness,
and take Shallow Hal's success, financial stability, and attentiveness,
and Tin Man's sexual capabilities
and roll it all it one dude,
I'd be straight.

But until I find that dude (or someone remotely close to that).  I guess I'll deal with the three I got.  It's too bad I can't think of any really good quality for Tin Man besides his dyck action though.  Oh..wait.  I got one.  He makes me laugh.  There ya go.  Besides that, that's all I can say about him. 

In any case, none of the situations are that cool but whatever. 

In other news...

  • I haven't been on here in while because I have a series coming up, "Interview With a Cock Sucker".  Well maybe I won't call him that cuz that's kinda harsh.  So I'm still thinking of a title, but the first installment is coming next week. 
  • My birthday is Friday.  Shallow Hal invited me out of town, but it wasn't like he invited me for my birthday so I ain't all giddy about the invitation.  He just happened to ask and the day to go just happens to be my birthday.  He MIGHT have done something for me though?  Yeah, possibly.  Honestly, he's just inviting me to have somebody to f*ck in between him playing in this tournament probably.  That's being real and I ain't gonna pretend like I don't know the deal.  I guess it's better than sitting around here doing nothing like I usually do on my birthday I guess.  So why not have a nice stiff one to play with that day?  LOL.  Ooh I am just awful aren't I?  But why front?  Females (and males) know they don't mind a little birthday sex so get the f*ck outta here if you try to look down on me for being real about it on this blog.  Anyway!  As for Shallow Hal, he is my type in a lot of ways...but he's just a dog.  A super dog as a matter fact.  I'll write more about him as he is the subject of the "Interview With a Cock Sucker" series.  I've heard of some muthafuccas in my time, but this one right!  As long as I don't criticize him he just keeps telling me more and more.  This series is gonna be quite interesting.
  • Found out that you can actually FINANCE plastic surgery!  Mmmm....interesting.
  • I guess I'm not gonna ever have a baby either.  With this birthday coming up, it's just not looking like it's gonna happen for me.  Not that I crave having one, but I guess I could.  I'm just a chicken.  I don't wanna get all big and outta shape.  I work out too hard to lose it all like that.  It's dumb to think this but I do.  I mean, what if I never go back to being fit?  It's a big fear of mine.  I don't want to LOOK like I had a baby you know?  You know how some women LOOK like they have had kids?  I know people go back to a nice size, but what if I don't?  Then, I don't know if I have the patience for noisy kids.  I was on the bus the other day and this kid was just making noise the entire bus ride.   I couldn't turn my music up loud enough to drown him out.  It scares me that I have such a low tolerance for kid noise.
  • I am masturbating waayyy too much.  I think about sex a lot.  And I mean a lot.  I even masturbate in the bathroom at work sometimes.  It's really a strange thing going on with me.  Too bad I have to waste my sex drive on dudes that I know that I won't have anything real with.  I think I'm really gonna try to find me a real sweetie this time, and try to stop fast forwarding my mind to the sex stuff. 
Anyway that's it for now.  Writing this made me feel a little better.  Still sad, but not as sad as before.


  1. Happy Early Birthday I hope you enjoy it and I cant wait to read about what happens next.

  2. Aw thank you! Yeah...I'm really formulating this series I'm gonna write. I hope it is as interesing in written format as it is when I hear it coming from his mouth.

  3. Your'e a Scorpio? My b-day is a day after yours, so Happy Birthday to you! I hope that you get over your sadness!

  4. Hey Scorpio! Yeah my bday is 11/11/11 this year. Hopefully all those 1s mean something that day. Happy bday to u too!!

  5. Happy Birthday EOTP! I knew there's a reason why I'm drawn to you...we're both Scorpios. I have to live vicariously through you b/c I haven't had sex in months and I have been a raging bitch too. LOL

    As for settling, I feel you on that. It's hard out here and I think I want to date but I feel confused. I have a new prospect that I'm psyched but nervous about. I think he and the cock sucker may be cousins. LOL

  6. 11-11-11 is suppose to be an AWESOME day and means something I don't know what...but something lol Have a great Birthday!!

  7. Hey Jetaime! Ok, ok that makes sense why we both can relate to what we write on our blogs. Scorpio love!

    Oooh and your new prospect may be like my Shallow Hal? Girl, do tell! I know when I tell the story y'all might call me nuts for even dealing with him.

    Hey Gorgeous...yeah I didn't even know it was gonna be all 1s on that day until I went to the bank a few months ago and the teller told me from looking at my ID. Dude has the same birthday and was saying he was going to Vegas because of the significance of the date have all the same number in it? Well..for sure I will play the lottery. Maybe play some roulette at the casino and see what happens???

    Thanks for the bday wishes my fellow bloggers!

  8. ...psss man already know. LOL

    i was doing that too, the "better than nothing" relationship and now there's NOTHING. so i cant honestly say it wasn't better than nothing, cuz nothing sucks!!! im like a dog in heat. wtf!!

    too bad i fell in love with that tinman and i can't sacrafice my heart to satisfy my cuca. :-( altho nights like last night had me fighting the feeling...just hoping that this 'safrafice' will pay off...yup. still waiting.

    last night i went to see my friends 5mnth old baby..and as i held this baby in my arms wondering if i would ever have my own and feeling so sad for fear that i wdnt...BAM! here walks in an old friend and of course the first questions are 'why aren't you married yet? when are you having kids?' and they always top it off with 'you're not getting any younger!' why do people feel they can say this to you? why is it ok to point out my single status & childlessness! this isn't facebook im not walking around with my status waiting for you to comment!!! keep your bullshit to yourself.

    honestly, i think people do it to be hurtful..because i'm single, i'm pretty, i'm in shape and i'm overall awesome! lol i think they like to point those things out so that they feel better about 'bitch dont have everything'

    sadness? please...there are people who are running the NYC marathon today. i think i'll stay in bed....again...

    oh wait, it was my intention to say something to cheer you up! lmfao sorry i'm a debbie downer but wishing you the best on your birthday!! :-)

  9. Hey Rells. You know that's a great blog post idea! How people ask you about having kids, getting married, and reminding you that you're getting older! Thank u!

    But I do like what you said...this ain't Facebook and I didn't need you to comment on my status. Girl you are waaay younger than me so you have worries. When you get to where I am then grow a gray hair about it. Until then, enjoy your singleness! There are no rules about what you should do in your life. I gotta keep tellin people that. I do what I want, with who I want. There is no law that says you got to be married, or be a momma by certain age, etc. I can't imagine doing anything to make another person 'accept' me or 'approve' me. Nuh uh. Even though I get sad, I don't GAF what other people think about that stuff. I can scold myself...thank you, and I do that quite often so I'm good in the self realization department.

    Good point on the 'better than nothing' thing. I definitely will consider what ya said on that my friend.

  10. That was a lot, couple of things. Happy Birthday, hope you enjoy the lil trip planned or unplanned. I want to ask what's your type?

  11. My "type" is:

    Ambitious/Got a life plan and acting on it
    Considerate and thoughtful
    Financially sound (or actively moving in that direction)
    Open minded/spontaneous/adventurous

    I'm sure I could come up with more but that's few.

    What I don't like:
    overly sensitive
    overly jealous
    avoids communication/closed off
    mean people/self centered/thoughtless

    That's just the basics. I don't like listing traits anyways. I'm flexible and have liked all different kinds of people. I just know it when I see it - ya dig?

    :) Nice question Theory.

  12. u have a fan all d way from uk- london, i love yr blog, its fire and soo real

  13. Hi Capricornista!

    Yeah I'm okay. I think about my blog all the time, and I used to sit here at work and type out stuff. But lately, I have actually had to do some work, and then I was doin this emailing back and forth with Shallow Hal about his shyt. Damn, I have some stuff to talk about too! I just need to try to get focused at home and do it...but when I get there I turn into a vegetable. I guess that's why I stay busy because being in the apartment zaps my energy and motivation.

    I will draft a little of my entry today at work. Just so to spark something. Head been hurting and I find myself squinting so that's been the hold up too. But no excuses. I'm gonna write at lunch. :)

    Thanks for asking about me Mami!

  14. Hey (eyesOTP) I'm missing you, get 2 writing (please) side note: Hope all is well

  15. Dang I know, I know! And I have sooooo much to write. This weekend. For sure.