Yes. Corny and horny. Not a good combination.
When I get home I just get undressed, eat, and then lay on the couch and daydream,
or I lay on the couch and sing along with the songs playing on the computer,
or I lay on the couch and listen to those azzholes upstairs romp back and forth.
I am becoming a little ridiculous with this laying down shyt. It's getting really bad. Is it age? I always wondered why my mother is always laying down in the bed. Is that just something you do as you get older? Hmmm. I wonder. All I know is I gotta shake this corny shyt off. I feel like a human cat. You know how they just lay around, then eat, then lay down some more? That's me on Saturday morning/Sunday afternoon. When I had my business I was ALWAYS running, thinking, moving. I begged for rest and free time and couldn't get it. Now it's like I have too much rest. And too much rest will be the death of me.
See I'm doing it again. I'm supposed to drafting my blueprint and I'm getting distracted. Ok so let me bang this out really quick. I have to put dates on as much as possible because if I don't then I won't be on top of it like I should. Here we go really quickly:
- Save $8K by the end of the year. I want to hit $10K but I'll set the bar at eight and will try to beat that.
- Decide by May if I am going to reopen my business or not.
- Market my consulting business at least once per quarter. I need more clients!
- Update my business website content at least monthly so that it comes up on Google better. I read that if you update your site more often with like news, etc it should come up more on Google? I hope so because when I Google it my shyt is on like page 15 in the searches. Not good.
- Go to a professional meetup or business meeting/seminar at least once a month.
- Learn to step. It's a shame that I'm from the Midwest and can barely step. Found this group in NYC that teaches it and I've been to a couple events. I'm still like a brand new pony with my legs though but I'm trying.
- Travel internationally. Bahamas in ten days baby!
- Travel to Arizona by August. I just wanna go there and check it out.
- I will not get any more than three parking tickets this year. Already got one already though. I gotta try harder. Last year I think I had about five or six. Living close to NYC is a beotch when it comes to parking.
- Buy only one bag of Tostitos a month. I'm addicted to nachos and salsa. I was buying like five bags of those multigrain joints and I would kill a bag in like a day and a half. I just inhale them and look in the empty bag and wonder how they went so fast. So if I buy this one bag of chips, and I eat them all up too fast...then I'll just be azzed out for the rest of the month. This tortilla chip madness has to end!
- Have one week a month where don't eat meat. I used to do the vegetarian thang and it wasn't that hard. Easy goal.
- Get killa thighs! So I have to modify my workouts to work my legs three days a week. I think I can do it. Seeing a little difference already.
- See about getting my earlobe fixed. It's kinda stretched and I wanna see how much it costs to fix it. It's not all that bad but I'll ask anyways. Last year I did my feet! I love looking at my toes now! :)
- Only have three and a half drinks when I go to the bar. I say 'a half' because I usually go when the have two for one and if I finish all four of them, I'll probably get a fifth. I don't want to waste the fourth drink that I bought, so I'll just sip on it and bounce. Did that two weeks ago at this bar and it seemed to work okay.
- Move out no later than May. I already decided that two weeks before I move out I'm gonna buy one of those sirens and turn it on when I come back at 3am or 4am from bartending. Yep. Gonna wake those muthafuccas up in mid-sleep like they do me every damn day at 5:15am (rubs hands together). Payback is a dog.
- Unsubscribe from all these crazy email things like Pizza Hut, Alamo Car Rental, Ebay, Best Buy, TJ Maxx, and crap like that. I even get emails from a cheese manufacturer. It's just ridiculous and it just fills up my mailbox.
- Men - uh, that's a whole blog in itself. But I will say that no more 'text convos'.
Five texts is the limit. Then somebody needs to to call.
- Don't give my number out to someone I know I don't wanna talk to. Just remind myself of that dude who sent me pics of a man with the dyck the size of the three cucumbers. Ignorant bastard.
- Stop believing and putting so much weight on someone's words. A person's actions is what I can take to the bank.
- Stop dealing with dudes that can't fluckin' spell. I'm tired of meeting these dummies in JC.
- If a dude says he works two jobs or more or works a lot of overtime then just keep on walking. He won't have time for me and will always be talking about work and how tired he is. VETO! I have nothing against a man working hard but those types just never pan out well on the quality time thing. Even a dude that has just one job and only talks about work is on the caution list with me.
- Either wear all the shyt in my apartment at some point in the next twelve months or get rid of it. Except for gowns,dresses, and certain shoes of course.
- Be on time for work, the gym, the bus, etc. Stop being 15 minutes late for every fluckin thing. And stop getting out of the bed at the last damn minute too. I just wanna kick myself for the lateness problem that I have.
- Get me a new kitty! Hopefully after I move. I like cats. I miss my suga bear sooo much.
- Check my personal email three times a day, not 333 times a day like I seem to do. Once before noon, once before six, and once before 11pm. That 'new email' sound makes you a slave to your phone and I'm taking the sound off today. I got this tip from an entrepreneur at a seminar who suggested this because he says you get distracted looking at these emails that come to your box all day. It pulls you in all kinds of directions at times. If something is urgent people should use another method to contact you. Now how I handle work email will be different, but I will just check it as it pops up on my computer while AT WORK. I don't do the Twitter thing and don't sweat FB that hard so I'm good with those things. This one will be HARD (very hard) but I'm gonna give it a try starting tomorrow. I'm just as addicted to checking email as I am with eating chips and salsa. It's like I can't help myself.
- Stop being so damn nice. I gotta stop and think and recognize shyt faster than I do. Then address the stankness IN THE MOMENT and not worry about if I'm being too this or too that. People disrespect me a lot I feel and I'm really tired of it. I really am. When I was younger I had a sharper tongue but these days not so much. What happened to all the sass I used to have? You need sass to keep people in check. For real.
Bartending tonight. Hope people come out with all of this ice. I need Bahama cash!