I know I'm dragging with posting but my last post shows that I had some big stuff on my mind. I have been having some crazy bad thoughts and mind tripping over a lot of things. I promised myself that this weekend I would post this even though I wrote it last week. But I think I am about to do some real Spartan shyt. Ain't about getting no man either. It's about something else. So I gotta get this caught up so I can write about my plan. I'll be back tomorrow.
I promise I will. Because this is big and time is of the essence. It could blow up in my face. It could do nothing at all. I dunno, but I only get one life and I'm feeling strongly about it.
Shallow Hal: "Yeah, I know. I gotta tell this girl."
Over the next few days he talked to me about who he should tell first, but on the real he really didn't know. It was just all f*cked up because he waited so long. From where I sat, I didn't see what difference it made anyway. I mean it would make more sense to tell the woman that he was living with first. I told him that ideally, he should have told Miss Caribbean BEFORE she got here to the States anyways. That way she could have decided if she wanted to still come or not. I also said that he should have told Miss New York when she first announced her pregnancy so she could have decided if she wanted to keep the baby or not. GIVE THEM CHOICES SHALLOW HAL!!!! CHOICES!!!
"Ain't nobody talking to me about shyt! This is not our country! That marriage shyt is not required if a woman gets pregnant! I ain't gettin' married.
Whatever mane. Maybe he didn't want to risk running into that uncle at the hospital. Maybe he was ashamed too?
Ashamed? Shallow Hal? Yeah right.
Then there was his job. He told his job that he was expecting a kid in December, but not with two women. Mr. Vice President didn't want that to get around at work that he had two chicks due at the same time. He couldn't drop the excuse of saying his baby momma was in the hospital because he would have to run that game twice. They would be like, "Damn, didn't you just have a baby?" It would raise too many eyebrows. So he had to pick the girl who he was gonna bounce out of work for, and it was quite obvious that it wasn’t gonna be Miss New York. Po' thang. Even still, he should have taken his azz there though. So any info and updates that SH got about the status of New York and her baby, was all gotten while he sat at his desk at work. Until the hospital told her to stay off the phone eventually because her blood pressure was just too high. Then there was silence. He’s emailing me sounding all annoyed, "I don't know what's going on!" Um, then why don't you take your azz over there muthafucca? Instead he just goes home after work and waits to hear from Miss New York. Like her being in the hospital with blood pressure high as hell and preggo at the same time was just normal shyt.
I just thought to myself, "Wow." I don't know who is sweeter (or more confused) - Miss C with her "Good night" text when he bolted from the house, or Miss New York telling her boo to keep working and not come to the hospital to see her. I wasn't saying that type of shyt though. The only texts I would have been sending would have been, "You betta bring you azz back TO-NIGHT!" Or "You can stay wherever you going. Don't even think about coming back here punk." I guess that's why he is sticking to chicks from his country because he knows how to choose the right prey. In fact, after the last American woman he dealt with smashed up his car he said he had come to 'appreciate' the women from his country a lot more. Hmmmm...I wonder why muthafucca? Cuz you can run over they azzes easier?
And to prove my point ---- he stays in New York for the next two days. When he returns Miss C is upset because she is 7.5 months pregnant herself and he didn't call once to check on her. Not once.
He texts me...
THEN THE MOMENT OF TRUTH FINALLY CAME FOR MISS C. One night when he returned home, he took Miss C to the grocery store right after he hit the door. As they are driving she notices his wrist. There is a bracelet on it from the hospital. Clearly it is from the baby ward.
He usually takes it off but forgot this time. He couldn't lie now. The evidence as to where he has been is right there on his arm. He says nothing else.
Strangely, Miss C doesn't say anything else either. She doesn’t ask anything else. She just sat quietly in the car and stared at him all the way to the store.
And she stayed in that bathroom. Crying and crying. Until the wee hours of the morning.
Aight. So that's two down: Me and Miss C.
Now it's your turn to be Sherlock Homegirl.
And as for me, why was I still around? Like I said I wanted to hear the story so I just played the game to get him to talk. I was so caught up that I wanted to know what was going on, but the whole shyt was messing with my brain at the same time. I started to tell Kim about it but eventually she didn't want to hear about it anymore. I mean she would get like ANGRY when I would tell her the stories and yell at me not to tell her another word. I was talking to the therapist about it, but I only get like 45 minutes to talk to her twice a month. I had to release it. To get it off my mind I started to blog about it. Is it helping? I think so. I got a not so pleasant message from a reader on the private email. I was questioned about my decision as to why I was dealing with Shallow Hal. Hey, I think I explained that in the first installment regarding this man. I did write back to that person however and said that I don't write my personal shyt to have to come back and defend it. I don't write it to entertain other people which was another point mentioned in that email. This shyt ain't hardly entertaining. What's here is real life. People do a lot of things that may not make sense to someone else. But this is reality. My reality. It's what is going on with me and I ain't fronting like I'm a saint or an angel because I.AM.NOT. If you wouldn't do what I do, or don't like the way I roll...hey it's all groovy. I always say that reading this blog is certainly optional.
And that's all I'm gonna say about that.